Bored Dead

Sorority Girls

free-game-girl.jpgWhat does a sorority girl put behind her ears to make her more attractive?

Her ankles.

What is the difference between a sorority girl and an elephant?

About 40 lbs.

How do you equalize the two?

Feed the elephant.

What’s the first thing a sorority girl does in the morning?

Introduce herself.

Walks home.

What’s the difference between a sorority girl and the Titanic?

Only 1500 went down on the Titanic.

How can you tell if a sorority girl has achieved orgasm?

She drops her nail file.

What do you get when you cross a sorority girl with an ape?

Don’t know. There is only so much an ape can be forced to do…

How do you get a sorority girl in your bed?

Grease her hips so she’ll fit through the door and throw a twinkie on

the bed.

Did you hear about the new sorority girl doll?

You put a ring on her finger and her hips expand.

What do you call 100 sorority girls sun-bathing on a beach in Cuba?

Bay of Pigs.

What do you call a sorority girl hang-glider festival?

Multiple total eclipses.

What is a sorority girl’s mating call…

“I’m soooo drunk, I’m sooooo drunk!”

What is the difference between a sorority girl and a toilet?

After you use a toilet it doesn’t follow you around for three days.

What do you get when cross a lawyer with a sorority girl??

Nothing. There are some things a sorority girl won’t do.

I don’t know, but it sure enjoys screwing people.

I don’t know, but when it sucks your cock, it does’t stop until it

gets blood.

What’s the difference between a sorority girl and a dog ?

Drivers will swerve to miss the dog.

How many sorority girls does it take to change a light bulb?

Two, one to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call Daaaaddy.

or

7, one to change it and six to go out and buy Tab (or diet Coke).

or

65, 1 to do it and 64 to sing and clap.

or

One. She holds on to it and the world revolves around her.

or

Six. One to screw it in and five to make the T-shirts.

Why is a sorority girl like railroad tracks?

She’s been laid all over the country.

Why does a sorority girl close her eyes during sex?

So she can fantasize about shopping.

What’s the difference between Jell-o and a sorority girl?

Jell-o wiggles when you eat it.

What do you call a sorority girl’s waterbed?

The Dead Sea

How can you tell if a sorority girl’s a nymphomaniac?

She’ll make love the same day she has her hair done.

What’s a sorority girl’s idea of natural childbirth?

No makeup.

What’s the difference between a sorority girl and a barracuda?

Nail polish.

How do you prevent a sorority girl from having sex?

Marry her.

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